The Requirements For Casting A Topless Scene Are Kind Of Ridiculous

‘They would have to have a good nipple size and colour.’

Casting director Sande Alessi speaks candidly with host Cleo Stiller about the thinking process behind casting an actress when nudity is required — and it’s not exactly body positive. In fact, ‘perfect looking’ breasts will often trump talent. “Well, it’s almost always looks,” Alessi starts, “And then we’ll see what their acting ability is next.”
When Stiller asks what Alessi is looking for, she states: “They would have to be perfect. They would have to have a good nipple size and colour. They’d have to be perky.” To be fair, this isn’t far off from what modeling agents are looking for (there’s a reason why Victoria’s Secret Angels have a pretty homogeneous body type), but Alessi’s brutal honesty can be quite jarring. Going through a lineup of breast shots, she takes Stiller through a typical casting conversation. “Her nipples are too big. Those are too droopy. These are way too small. It’s so sad because she’s so pretty.”
Vanessa Hudgens

 
The kicker comes when Stiller asks what would happen if a particularly talented actress came in to audition and nailed the character, but possessed uneven breasts. “She’s just not gonna get it,” Alessi replies in an apologetic, yet factual tone.
Casting director Sande Alessi speaks candidly with host Cleo Stiller about the thinking process behind casting an actress when nudity is required — and it’s not exactly body positive. In fact, ‘perfect looking’ breasts will often trump talent. “Well, it’s almost always looks,” Alessi starts, “And then we’ll see what their acting ability is next.”
When Stiller asks what Alessi is looking for, she states: “They would have to be perfect. They would have to have a good nipple size and colour. They’d have to be perky.” To be fair, this isn’t far off from what modeling agents are looking for (there’s a reason why Victoria’s Secret Angels have a pretty homogeneous body type), but Alessi’s brutal honesty can be quite jarring. Going through a lineup of breast shots, she takes Stiller through a typical casting conversation. “Her nipples are too big. Those are too droopy. These are way too small. It’s so sad because she’s so pretty.”
The kicker comes when Stiller asks what would happen if a particularly talented actress came in to audition and nailed the character, but possessed uneven breasts. “She’s just not gonna get it,” Alessi replies in an apologetic, yet factual tone.
Knowing that on-screen breasts must meet such scrupulous standards — where perkiness and nipple color are valued more than skill at a craft — kind of, well, sucks. Heaven forbid lopsided breasts make their way into mainstream media. There’s just no miracle cream to fix non-screen-worthy boobs.
It’s no wonder women are so conscious about their bodies when only one kind of ideal is presented on screen. Teens especially, who are looking at a world coloured through the false reality of social media, see only one type of body and aim to project that same body to the world. Even celebrities praised for their figures are called out for Photoshopping their bodies; no one is immune to the pressures of perfection.
The good thing about this is, the more we talk about it, the more we realize unrealistic these standards are. Sites like 007b, that feature user submitted galleries of real life chests, paint a better picture of what the world’s breasts really look like. Fancy that, all the breasts aren’t the same — almost as if it were a reflection of reality.
Seeing is believing … It’s simply RIDICULOUS!

1. TAYLOR SWIFT DRUNK NAKED PHOTO LEAKED

This photo of what appears to be a drunk and naked Taylor Swift spreading eagle in someone’s dorm room has just been leaked online.
No doubt Taylor got wasted on hunch punch at some college house party, and then was taken home and photographed naked by a snot-nosed freshman.

Taylor Swift appears to have gotten completely naked and climbed on a table in the extremely inappropriate photo above.

Country music star Taylor Swift appears to be naked and bent over a chair in the photo above
2. Kristen Stewart

Kristen Stewart shows off her sinfully silky smooth vagina in the scandalous photo above.
3. Mila Kunis

Mila Kunis lays naked on her bed in the extremely suggestive photo above.
4. Kelly Brook

More nude cell phone pics of busty English model and actress Kelly Brook have just been leaked to the Web.

5. NINA DOBREV FINALLY POSES COMPLETELY NUDE

“The Vampire Diaries” star Nina Dobrev finally poses completely nude in the photo above.
6. VICTORIA JUSTICE CAUGHT DILDOING HER ASS

Victoria Justice’s love of sex toys and her general proclivity for all phallic objects has been well documented through the years online. That is why it should come as no surprise to see Victoria dildoing her tight little asshole in the photo above.
7. NEW KIM KARDASHIAN NAKED SELFIE LEAKED

A new naked Kim Kardashian selfie has just been leaked online. This nude photo along with the other two lingerie pics posted below are reportedly from Kim’s soon to be released autobiography titled “Selfish”.
When Kim walked into the office of a big time New York publisher and told him that she wanted to write her memoirs, the publisher was skeptical as books generally average around 80,000 words and Kim is barely literate. However, the next day Kim Kardashian came back and plopped an old shoebox filled with 82 extremely dirty selfie photos on the publisher’s desk, and informed him that a picture is worth a thousand words so she has given him an extra two thousand for the editors to play with.
Needless to say the publisher knows a hit novel when he sees it, and Kim’s “Selfish” book of explicit selfies will certainly be on the New York Times best sellers list for years to come, for the infidel public’s appetite for depravity and celebrity tell-alls knows no bounds. The chapter titled “My Gaping Asshole” is supposed to be especially revealing.
8. KALEY CUOCO’S DELETED “BIG BANG THEORY” SEX SCENE

The finale for the 8th season of “The Big Bang Theory” was Thursday night, and for weeks leading up to the show Kaley Cuoco had been hinting about some exciting cliffhanger. However, when the finale aired it was nothing out of the ordinary, which left fans of the show to wonder what the hell Kaley was going on about.
Well it turns out that at the last minute CBS’s censors pulled Kaley’s graphic sex and masturbation scene from the end of the show, when network execs got cold feet about how the scene would play with CBS’s key demographic of dementia ridden seniors aged 75-years-old and up. Luckily for the diehard Big Bang Theory fans we have obtained a copy of this censored sextastic season finale, and have posted it in the video below.
9. NEW EMILY RATAJKOWSKI NAKED SELFIE LEAKED

Model Emily Ratajkowski just had this new naked selfie photo leaked to the Web.
As you may remember, Emily Ratajkowski had a great number of nude private pictures leaked during “the fappening” last year. However, with the leak of this new photo it is clear that either all of her photos were not leaked, or in an even more likely scenario, she is taking new ones and leaking them herself for attention.
10. EMMA WATSON GETS COMPLETELY WTF NUDE

Emma Watson gets her lady hole completely exposed in the new nude photo above.
11. KAREN GILLAN NUDE PHOTO RELEASED

“Guardians of the Galaxy” star and saucy Scottish redheaded minx Karen Gillan poses nude in the photo above.
12. SELENA GOMEZ SHOWS HER BARE BUTT

Selena Gomez shows off her smooth bare butt in the nude photo above.

Selena Gomez poses completely nude in these photos from the new issue of Good Housekeeping magazine.
With this nude photo shoot Selena Gomez is trying to show that the modern Mexican maid does not have to wear a drab uniform, but can instead fully express her degenerate nature by scrubbing the toilets and dusting the doilies in the buff.
13. GIGI HADID COVERED NUDES FOR V MAGAZINE

Model Gigi Hadid poses for some covered nude photos in the new issue of V magazine.
14. OLIVIA WILDE GETS NAKED FOR THE NFL DRAFT

 

Actress Olivia Wilde strips naked in the home of a powerful Muslim Sheikh in the photo above.
15. NINA AGDAL NUDE FOR A CONFUSING AD CAMPAIGN

Nina Agdal shows off her perky tits and tight ass while completely nude for a confusing ad campaign in the photos below.
It is difficult to say what exactly Nina Agdal is trying to sell in these nude pics. Is it sneakers, running, blurry nipples, or just being a tremendous slut?
16. KRISTEN WIIG NUDE SCREENCAPS FROM ‘WELCOME TO ME’

 

A naked photo of Kristen Stewart has just leaked to the Web.

17. JESSICA ALBA BATHING NAKED WITH ANOTHER WOMAN

Actress Jessica Alba was caught bathing naked with another woman in the photo above.
Jessica Alba tanning naked below

18. CHLOE MORETZ SHOWS OFF HER NUDE BODY

As soon as Chloe Moretz turned 18-years-old a few months ago, nude photos of her started appearing online.

Chloe Grace Moretz just recently turned 18-years-old, and already she is making a name for herself as one of the most brazen harlots in all of heathen Hollywood.
Just by looking at the Chloe Moretz nude photo above in which she has a big black dildo stuffed firmly up her ass while stares pensively off into the distance, it is clear that this next generation of Hollywood whores led by Chloe are going to be the most annoyingly depraved yet.
19. CARRIE UNDERWOOD NUDE ON ALL FOURS

Country music star Carrie Underwood shows off her tight ass while posing nude on all fours in a clear effort to seduce us. Carrie is assuming a woman’s most natural and halal position by appearing on her hands and knees in this photo.

A nude photo of country music star Carrie Underwood has just been leaked to the Internet.
20. SCARLETT JOHANSSON NAKED WITH HER LEGS SPREAD WIDE

With her new blockbuster movie “Avengers 2: The Age of Ultron” set to open in theaters in just a few short months, Scarlett Johansson is stepping up her sluttery by spreading her legs wide in the naked photo above.
If Scarlett wants to stay a part of the billion dollar Avengers franchise then she has no choice but to continue to whore her naked body to draw attention for the films.

Scarlett Johansson appears to get banged in the ass while swallowing a load in this screen cap from “The Avengers 2″.