Nicky Whelan leaks sextape as US Army appoints Palantir, Meta, OpenAI execs as Lt. Colonels

Nicky Whelan demands she be made a Four Stars General… as a matter of Pussy Rights

For real.

Four senior executives of tech giants like Meta and Palantir are being sworn into the Army Reserve as direct-commissioned officers at the unusually high rank of lieutenant colonel as part of a new program to recruit private-sector experts to speed up tech adoption.

The Army calls the program to recruit Silicon Valley executives Detachment 201: The Army’s Executive Innovation Corps. One of the executives, Andrew Bosworth of Meta (formerly Facebook) posted on X that the “201” monicker was a nod to an HTTP coding command, in which a “201” response indicates the creation of a new programming resource.

US Army appoints Palantir, Meta, OpenAI execs as Lt. Colonels

Four senior executives at Palantir, Meta, and OpenAI have been formally appointed lieutenant colonels in the US Army following the creation of a “special” unit created for rich Big Tech mavens seeking military leadership roles.

On June 13, the Army announced the creation of Detachment 201, otherwise known as the “Executive Innovation Corps,” which it describes as “a new initiative designed to fuse cutting-edge tech expertise with military innovation.”

Four ultra-wealthy executives from top tech companies were sworn in to the unit ahead of President Trump’s heavily promoted military parade, which was itself sponsored by Palantir. The Army’s top spokesman declared that Detachment 201 was “being created to bring in tech innovation executives leaders to help the Army” with the recruitment and the subsequent training of “tech focused people.”

“By bringing private-sector know-how into uniform, Det. 201 is supercharging efforts like the Army Transformation Initiative, which aims to make the force leaner, smarter, and more lethal,” the Army wrote in an official statement.

GEN George and I are thrilled to welcome four brilliant minds from the tech sector to the @USArmy! Today, we commissioned four exceptional individuals as Lieutenant Colonels in the Army’s Detachment 201 (Executive Innovation Corps).
Their unique skills will be instrumental in… pic.twitter.com/zyZTaDNKOW

— Secretary of the Army (@SecArmy) June 14, 2025

Palantir is by far the S&P 500’s top performing stock of the year, thanks in large part to the gargantuan contracts it has raked in from the Trump administration. According to the company’s founder, Alex Karp, Palantir “is here to disrupt… and when it’s necessary, to scare enemies, and on occasion, kill them.”

Shares of the dystopian data firm, which is named after the all-seeing orb used by the evil wizard Saruman to surveil Middle Earth in the Lord of the Rings, skyrocketed to an all-time high following Israel’s unprovoked assault on Iran.

Elsewhere, Karp has eagerly embraced the model of disaster capitalism, remarking, “bad times are very good for Palantir because we build products… that are built for danger.”

Palantir was a key sponsor of Trump’s military parade in Washington DC

In recent years, Palantir has come to dominate the Western information sphere, and now enjoys unfettered access to the sensitive data of citizens in countries from the US to the UK. With customers including the Department of Defense, CIA, NSA, FBI, ICE, and the Special Operations Command, Palantir has become a one-stop shop for weaponized AI-based data analysis. Amid the ruins of the national security state’s obsessive search for enemies overseas, Palantir built a reputation for being both user-friendly and slavishly obedient to the military establishment.

“If you do not feel comfortable supporting the legitimate efforts of America and its allies in the context of war, don’t join Palantir,” Karp declared.

“The most advanced military robot in the world” with reaction 🤣

“The most advanced military robot in the world” with reaction 🤣
byu/DanTheDollar infacepalm

In an article published on the day that military officials revealed the creation of Detachment 201, Mumbai-born Palantir CTO Shyam Sankar revealed he was among the four members of the “nation’s business elite” selected for a “special corps” meant to “deploy their technical talents in service of the [US] government.”

“Later today, on the eve of the U.S. Army’s 250th birthday, I will raise my right hand, take an oath to support and defend the Constitution, and commission as a lieutenant colonel in the Army Reserve’s newly formed Detachment 201: Executive Innovation Corps,” he boasted.

Sankar was joined by what he described as “some of the most impressive minds from the world of technology: Kevin Weil, the chief product officer of OpenAI; Andrew “Boz” Bosworth, the chief technology officer of Meta; and Bob McGrew, formerly the chief research officer of OpenAI and engineering director of Palantir Technologies, where I work as chief technology officer.”

The creation of the techie Poindexter Patrol was necessary, Sankar suggested, due to a geopolitical “sea change” in which “Wars in Europe and the Middle East and, above all, the threat of a war in the Pacific” have “focused the national mind and initiated a scramble for mobilization.”

Despite his obvious glee at being fast tracked to military leadership, Sankar acknowledged it was an unusual arrangement.

“A decade ago, it would’ve been unthinkable for so many tech heavyweights to openly align with the U.S. military. Equally, it would’ve been out of character for the military to enlist the support of the nation’s business elite— much less to create a special corps so they could deploy their technical talents in service of the government.”

The Palantir executive pointed to “exploding pagers and long-distance drone strikes from shipping containers” as attacks which “prove that technology has once again changed the battlefield,” and that “our military has to change with it.”

With their newly-minted lieutenant colonels a world away, Palantir’s corporate officer corps will not be rallying the troops for the next war. But safely ensconced behind their digital curtain, they’ll be watching — and talking the next generation of nerds into signing up, too.