Donald Trump’s greatest achievement

Donald Trump’s greatest achievement
by Drew SalisburyMelania Trump
Donald Trump may not be the only candidate for president with a little acting experience under his belt, but he is the only one to win accolades for his performance, or more accurately, how bad it was.

Trump (for some reason) appears in the film, once again playing himself (in all possible meanings of the phrase). I assume he had to have helped finance the disaster in exchange for some screen time and a plug for “his” book, “The Art of the Deal,” which Derek mentions in one scene.
The Cinema Snob has a pretty good run down of the entire film, which, when Trump is not on screen, mostly seems to focus on full frontal nudity.

Donald Trump may not be the only candidate for president with a little acting experience under his belt, but he is the only one to win accolades for his performance, or more accurately, how bad it was.
Many are no doubt aware of his brief cameo in “Home Alone 2,” but lesser known is Trump’s more substantial role three years earlier in the Bo Derek/husband John Derek pet project “Ghosts Can’t Do It,” starring Anthony Quinn as a horny ghost who, along with his still-corporeal wife (Derek), attempt to find a man to kill so that Quinn can possess the body and they can bone once again.
Peep the trailer.

If you’re wondering how you never heard of “Ghosts Can’t Do It,” it’s because it was released straight-to-VHS in Australia before its incredibly brief run in American theaters the following year. You’ll be shocked to hear it was universally panned by critics, receiving Golden Raspberry Awards for Worst Picture, Worst Director, Worst Actress, and Worst Supporting Actor, which brings us to the presumptive Republican presidential nominee.
Trump (for some reason) appears in the film, once again playing himself (in all possible meanings of the phrase). I assume he had to have helped finance the disaster in exchange for some screen time and a plug for “his” book, “The Art of the Deal,” which Derek mentions in one scene. And what a scene it is:

According to The Daily Beast, Quinn’s character is coaching Derek’s through some sort of business negotiation with Trump, but I’ll just have to take the publication’s word for it because it’s honestly hard to tell just what the fuck is going on between the shitty writing, delivery, and direction. Quinn, a two-time Academy Award winner, was either phoning this one in for the check or starting to lose it in his old age, because his part consists mostly of making goofy noises and randomly cussing.
But, Christ, Trump and Derek’s exchange is especially cringe-worthy. “Be assured, Mrs. Scott, that in this room there are knives sharp enough to cut you to the bone,” Trump says at one point. “And hearts cold enough to eat yours as hors d’oeuvres.”
“You’re too pretty to be bad,” Derek’s character replies.
“You noticed,” Trump says, pouting, before I barf all over my computer keyboard.
The Cinema Snob has a pretty good run down of the entire film, which, when Trump is not on screen, mostly seems to focus on full frontal nudity. Oh, and a “gag” scene during which Derek tries to convince a hitman that he came to rape her, not murder her, a punchline which seems to have played just as well in 1989 as it does in 2016. As San Francisco Chronicle film critic Mick LaSalle wrote in his original review:

“In one scene Kate is chased from the shower to a swimming pool by a hit man. ‘I will not let you rape me,’ she says. Derek says this as though she were yelling at the family cat. Then when the man makes it clear that he has no intention of raping her but plans to kill her instead, she changes her tune. ‘Rape me!’ she says. Bo Derek is even a worse actress than John Derek is a writer, and that’s saying something.”

Trump would go on to appear as the father of that rich little shit Waldo in 1994’s “Little Rascals” remake, and “Zoolander,” but he would never again earn the sort of recognition he got from “Ghosts Can’t Do It.” Until November, at least, when he might be elected president of the United States.
Melania Trump

Ivanka Trump